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In Leadership; Fear is Unfair
Unfortunately, all too many of us have experience with a fear based leader, commonly referred to as a workplace bully. If you don’t recognize this term or how it may be applied at your workplace I’ll take a moment to help you identify it. Benedict Carey of the New York Times describes bully bosses this way, “A boss who loves making subordinates squirm, whole moods radiate through the office, sending workers scurrying for cover, whose very voice causes stomach muscles to clench and pulses to quicken.” To accomplish this feeling, a bully boss will call you into his office, share with you an unflattering rumor about you, or tell you what “everyone” is saying about you, tell you of his superior’s impressions of your work, threaten your job, constantly remind you of your incompetence, or alienate you. The physical/emotional impact on workers can include heightened heart rate, blood pressure, anxiety, sweating or emotional volatility.
The Impact: The impacts of a boss who uses fear go much further and wider than you might expect. Having a bully for a boss deflates your mood, amplifies your insecurities, and increases your anxiety. Basically, the physiological reaction is similar to PTSD. Former Sacramento teacher and administrator, Carrie Clark, reported to the New York Times that after 10 months of being baited and insulted by her boss, “It got to where I was twitching, literally, on the way to work.” She left that job because, as she put it, “I had to take care of my health.” The stress associated with a bully boss leads to high blood pressure, hypertension, greater risk of heart attacks and other stress related maladies. Recent research reveals that 75% of the stress working people experience in their lives is related to treatment by their boss. People are impacted whether they are the target of the boss, if they witness the boss’s misbehavior, or if they heard the story from the target or a witness. In short, everyone is impacted. The consequence of this conduct is poor performance, stealing, increased sick days and infighting among team members.
These egomaniacal tyrants either don’t know or don’t care about the people they harm, either way, their behavior is worse than incompetent. It’s evil. If you use fear as a tool to lead your team, you are an evil person. In most cases, these insecure individuals usually feather their nests by sucking up to their superiors while treating team members like dirt. This kiss up, smack down behavior is both toxic for the organization and blinding to the senior leaders who are in charge of the organization and the people who are usually targeted. For this reason, a bully boss can survive and be protected for years without being detected.
Dealing with it: The strategy that works for me may not work for you but I’m going to put it out there for you to consider. First, I would recommend reading Robert I. Sutton’s book, “The No Asshole Rule”. It covers all types of workplace jerk behavior and how to deal with it. Further, it touches on how to deal with an asshole as a boss. Second, I will tell you to immediately unplug emotionally from the boss. If you aren’t invested in his/her opinion of you, then their words and conduct will have less of an impact on you and your work performance. 3. Find another job. Knowing how long this conduct is likely to continue and how devastating its impact is, the best move is to find another boss.
Move on: Find a new job, department, team or organization. That boss and that job isn’t worth the health risk. Learn the lesson and do your best to avoid allowing your ego to reign over your behavior toward other people. Whether you one day become the boss or just lead a small corner of the organization, make sure that you never treat anyone in ways that diminishes them. Where you can, identify and eliminate bullies for the sake of your people and your organization.
I usually like to have more positive themes in my articles, however because of a recent conversation I had with a friend about her experience at work, I decided to go there. Keep in mind that the boss’s impact on others is greater than a colleague’s, the boss’s words and actions mean more so go out of your way to be kind and inclusive. Put simply, follow the golden rule, and treat people the way you hope to be treated by others. It’ll go a lot further with your people and the organizational benefits are worth it. Kindness is the key, make it your guiding principle and your organization will SOAR!!!
William A. Brown
April 7, 2019
https://www.nytimes.com/2004/06/22/health/fear-in-the-workplace-the-bullying-boss.html
